One of the realities of change is that there is a letting go of something as you head towards what is new. Many times when you have to let go of something, that causes some grief to occur. Now to many of you, this all may seem painfully obvious. I can say that it does now to me also. However, I find that sometimes the obvious can escape me.
When we are working with churches that are in the midst of change, we must keep in mind the effect that grief can have on the individuals within the church. Often when we encounter resistance, we can become frustrated because it appears that nothing we do will appease those causing the resistance. We fight with ourselves because we are trying to be faithful to where we feel the Spirit is leading but there seems to be an anchor around our necks.
Have recent experience with this in the congregation that I am leading, it took a church leader to state the obvious to me before I came to realize the problem. The resistance that we were experiencing was caused not so much by the changes that were taking place but instead by the grief that came from the reality that the church that existed 30 years ago was not going to be the church that exists today. We were busy trying to treat the symptoms of that grief instead of facing the grief itself.
Now grief cannot stop us from following where the Lord is leading but it can change how we respond to the resistance we experience. As many of you know, the most important thing to do when someone is dealing with grief is to be there to listen. So our first step in dealing with resistance should be to listen with our hearts to what the individuals are sharing. While listening we also have to acknowledge that they have grief associated with a letting go of the way living out our church life has been as we move toward what the Lord desires our church life to be today. Validate their feelings as they share.
We are called to walk this journey together. Sometimes that means walking through grief to get us to the new creation that the Lord intends. And never underestimate the power of grief.
Keep transforming!!!!
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